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Tom Sandoval claims he broke up with Ariana Madix weeks earlier than she caught him having an affair with their Vanderpump Rules co-star and longtime pal, Raquel Leviss.

Whereas showing on Howie Mandel‘s podcast on Tuesday, Sandoval advised he and Ariana have been extra like “roommates” and “lacking” intimacy earlier than their cut up as he admitted Raquel was like a drug, recalled their “magnetic” first kiss, and shaded his castmates for his or her many comments in regards to the scandal.

“Utilizing this to make it appear to be the whole lot I’ve accomplished for them — they make it out like I am a narcissist,” Sandoval stated of his co-stars on the April 11 episode of Howie Mandel Does Stuff, per Us Weekly. “You’re taking what I did with this affair, and you might be erasing the final 15 years of our friendship.”

“Utilizing all these items as content material for his or her podcast. Fellow forged members are asking me all these questions, however you don’t wish to know since you care about Ariana [Madix]. You wish to know so you’ve gotten extra content material to your podcast,” he went on. “It’s f-cking disgusting to me. It’s so gross. You aren’t somebody who provides a flying f-ck about Ariana. You might be doing this to your personal private acquire.”

For the reason that information broke of his and Raquel’s affair in early March, Sandoval has struggled with “darkish ideas” as folks proceed to debate the matter.

“I don’t know [why it blew up]. I simply suppose it was actually surprising. This occurred when there wasn’t quite a bit happening [in the news],” he suspected.

Sandoval then addressed the space between him and Ariana within the months main as much as their cut up.

“That was type of mentioned, nevertheless it form of went unsaid. Our communication was not nice. I really feel like that’s a fault on each of us,” Sandoval stated, by way of TooFab.

In accordance with Sandoval, he began “to really feel trapped” in his relationship with Ariana as he approached his fortieth birthday and likened their dynamic to a “actually bleak” scenario.

“[I needed to] make a change to really feel alive once more, to really feel motivated,” he defined, noting that he was in a “very darkish place” and “craving for a connection.”

As each he and Ariana struggled with anxiousness and melancholy, he and Raquel grew to become “actually, actually good associates,” kissing for the primary time in his yard someday after guys’ night, once they have been seen wanting “cozy,” however earlier than Scheana Shay and Brock Davies‘ August 2022 wedding, the place Raquel kissed Tom Schwartz.

“We kissed. It was like magnetic. We have been speaking, shifting nearer. After which hastily we’re like kissing,” he recalled. “I felt one thing that I hadn’t felt in so lengthy. Like, emotionally.”

“After Raquel and I kissed and I felt this manner, I obtained my a– into remedy instantly to attempt to determine what the hell I’m gonna do as a result of the emotions have been very, very robust,” he continued. “These emotions that I had began to form of take over. Logic, all that sh-t went out the window.”

Wanting again at their preliminary moments collectively, Sandoval stated Raquel was like a drug and admitted it was a “very unhealthy” scenario.

“It made us each obsessive over attempting to see one another and stuff,” he defined.

Though Sandoval was “a bit jealous” when Raquel kissed Schwartz, he stated they solely did so as a result of they “had been crucified like they have been in a full blown relationship by [Katie Maloney] and [Lala Kent].”

Within the weeks that adopted his and Raquel’s first kiss, Sandoval stated he tried to withstand Raquel and commenced going to remedy with Ariana. Nonetheless, whereas he claims he “began to slowly plant the seed” about breaking apart along with her, she seemed to be in “denial.”

“She had heard issues and seen issues about Raquel however was very a lot turning a blind eye — or trusting me I suppose,” he defined.

Ultimately, Sandoval’s efforts to keep away from Raquel ended as the 2 of them started spending time collectively “as typically” as attainable and FaceTiming “on a regular basis.”

In the meantime, Ariana didn’t know a factor “as a result of that’s how separate [their] lives have been.”

“I needed to inform her, ‘Have you ever not observed how distant I’ve been currently?’ And he or she’s like, ‘Oh, you’ve gotten?’ She didn’t even discover, that’s how our relationship was, we had separate lives,” Sandoval shared. “So after I stated hypothetically if we broke up, she principally was like, properly, positively not going to the reunion, I’m quitting the present, f-ck the sandwich shop, we’re selling the house and deleting all social media and I’m shifting away.”

Regardless of Ariana’s threats, Sandoval stated he dumped her on Valentine’s Day and deliberate to maintain the information to themselves till they might “work out a method to navigate this” in a method that will assist them each.

In accordance with Sandoval, Ariana was “very upset” and “punched” him.

“She’s like, ‘I’m, like, not letting you permit me. You’re gonna should pressure me out of this relationship,’” he claimed. “I didn’t know what to do. She was fully in denial and never accepting it.”

Even after Ariana learned about his romance with Raquel, Ariana was “attempting to persuade [Sandoval] to not be damaged up” and questioned him about “getting [his] sperm checked to fertilize my eggs.”

“It actually scared me,” he admitted.

Sandoval went on to say that “nothing is excusable for what I did” and confessed he “f—ed up” and “positively deserved” backlash earlier than including that the one individual he owes a proof to is Ariana.

“On digicam, off digicam, if Ariana desires to know any particulars, I’ll totally go into that. She’s the one one who deserves that,” he stated.

As for the place he stands with Raquel, Sandoval stated, “We’re actually good associates, we’re not placing any label on it. We’re additionally taking a break.”

He then denied they’re “associates with advantages” and admitted “it’s not gonna be straightforward to return or movie” season 11, though he’s not contractually obligated to return.

Vanderpump Guidelines season 10 airs Wednesdays on Bravo.